This is the first post I’ve published since the My Story series. I like those posts. Other people like those posts. I liked that they were the first posts you saw when you went to my blog. So I kinda stopped posting. I’ve written a few things since that series, but I just didn't put them up. I guess I was worried they wouldn’t live up to expectations. My expectations. My expectations of what I think your expectations are. There’s a feeling of living up to the quality/likeability/whatever it was that resonated with My Story. A bar has been set, and I have to at least reach it.
So imma break the streak and actually post something. About expectations. How do I feel about them? Good or bad? Well, when it comes to dealing with anxiety, they’re probably bad. Not to judge or anything. ;)
But Cameron, what about positive visualization? Please, call me Cam.
…Oh, okay. But Cam, what about positive visualization? You know what, I’m good either way. Cameron’s fine.
(clears throat) What about positive visualization? Great! Love it. Do it. Go nuts. If you can believe the things you visualize, and not just think of them as a thing you’re supposed to do.
The reason I say expectations are “bad” for anxiety is because our expectations are usually negative.
The reason I haven’t posted anything since the “My Story” posts wasn’t that I thought they’d be better and I’d get too much traffic and it would crash the site and I’d become rich and famous and own a cat.
I think expectations are tougher for us to do positively. The term “expectations” is usually grounded in “reality.” Let’s be realistic here. It’s fine to do all this positive visualization, but what are we realistically expecting?
Being realistic is our excuse to shit on things. As though reality is always shittier than what we dream will happen.
Positive Thinking: Cameron, post this and you might help people. Or get a million likes. Or hits. Or whatever happens in blog world to let you know you’re worth something.
Realistic Expectation: Cameron, probably very few people will read this, and chances are you’ve said this stuff before and it’s not that helpful. And you smell.
To me, the problem comes when we believe the second one has more weight to it. It’s the real one. The probable one. The one that’s legit, instead of just dream talk.
So I guess I’m saying, if you are going to do both, be open to both. Equally. I think right now “bad” things are considered more realistic and logical and grounded in sanity, whereas “good” things happening is more unrealistic and intangible, and not as likely to happen.
Fuck that!
A shitty outcome isn’t realistic thinking. It’s just shitty thinking. Expect shit and believe in shit and you’re attracting shit. Expect the best goddammit. Expect and believe that the goodest outcome is not only possible, it’s the probable one.
In an interview before the release of Extras, Ricky Gervais said “This is my long-awaited new programme that some critics are already calling the disappointing follow-up to The Office.” But without Extras, we wouldn’t have this:
How do you follow a creative success? Just do something else. If it’s not as good, it’s not as good. If it’s gooder, it’s gooder. Only one way to find out.
It’s good to be back.